The amygdala is a tiny part of the brain, the shape and size of an almond. The amygdala handles both positive and negative information, and it is especially important in fear. It works like an alarm that helps protect the body from danger. The amygdala can detect an important fearful event and pass that information to the prefrontal cortex. The prefrontal cortex acts as the brain's control center. It is at the front of the brain, and it handles planning, impulse control, attention and decision-making. It also helps people pause, think and choose what to do.

Feelings happen in the brain and the body. When you are scared, your body releases a hormone that makes your heart beat faster. When you feel afraid, your breathing can speed up. When you are angry, your heart rate speeds up too. In the fight-or-flight response, the body gets ready to face danger or run from it. Anger and fear can both make a person shaky and make the heart beat faster, so different emotions can feel alike in the body. Fear helps keep people safe by getting the body ready to get away from danger. Emotions have helped people survive.

After danger has passed, the body has a way back to calm. The parasympathetic nervous system, sometimes called the rest-and-digest system, slows heart rate, supports digestion and restores the body to balance. It helps the body settle back to calm. Emotions typically do not last longer than an hour, though they vary in how quickly they begin and fade. There are also simple tools to calm down. Deep breathing is a way to calm down. Breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth is one way, and the breath can flow deep into the belly without forcing it. Feeling listened to and understood can help a person calm down too.

Emotions are not made in one place. They are processed by many different areas of the brain, and many parts of the brain work together to make an emotion. Scientists think emotions are made up of several parts that work together, involving both the brain and the body and how they interact. The experiential part of an emotion, what we feel in our bodies, is the only part we really notice. The other parts happen so fast that we do not realize they are happening. Many brain structures involved in emotion are part of the limbic system, which includes the amygdala and connections to the prefrontal cortex.

Thoughts matter too. Feelings are often caused by what a person thinks about a situation. Thinking a situation is dangerous tends to bring fear, and thinking it is good tends to bring joy or happiness. Two people can be in the same situation and feel different emotions because they have different thoughts about it. Reappraisal means trying to change your thoughts about a situation, which can change how you feel. When people are sad they usually think of sad memories, and when they are happy they usually think of happy memories. Emotions are feelings caused by situations that are meaningful or important to you, that you feel or show through body language, and that may compete with other important things.

Emotion regulation means changing or managing your feelings. Because the brain's regulating system is still maturing, young children often feel emotions more intensely and find it harder to regulate their reactions. Regulating emotions and managing behavior are skills that develop slowly over time during childhood. Infants and young children show emotions with facial expressions, laughing, cuddling or crying, but cannot yet name an emotion or say why they feel it. Emotional awareness means recognizing, respecting and accepting your feelings as they happen; it does not mean dwelling on them or constantly talking about how you feel. With practice, people get better at knowing what they are feeling.

Words to know

• amygdala: the brain's alarm
• prefrontal: brain's front
• limbic: emotion brain system
• parasympathetic: calming system
• regulation: managing feelings