Peer pressure is the feeling of being pushed by friends or classmates. The push is to think, look or act a certain way. Friends can influence what you choose to do, and you can influence them too. Your peers are people about your age. Peers can be close friends, or other kids you know, like classmates and teammates.

Feeling pushed by friends is a normal part of growing up. Nearly everyone has been in that spot. One reason kids go along with friends is that they want to fit in. Some kids go along because they want to be liked. Others make their own choices while still listening to what friends say.

Pressure can come from inside you, from wanting to belong, even when nobody asks you to do anything. Some pressure is about little things. It might be the music, shows or clothes that friends like. A kid can feel the pull to belong without hearing one word from a friend.

Pressure can be a force for good. It can show kids kind or hard-working role models. Friends can push you toward being kind or working hard. A push from a friend does not have to be a bad one. Friends can help each other in kind ways, such as sharing, taking turns and speaking kindly.

Friends can also pull you toward good things. Friends can study together. Friends can volunteer. Friends can play sports together. Kids can do these good things side by side, and pressure from friends can help get them there. Studying together, volunteering and playing sports are good things that friends can pull you toward.

Feeling uncomfortable about what a friend wants is a sign to stop and think, even if the friend seems fine with it. You can say "no thanks" to something you do not want to do. A short, simple line is enough to say no. "No thanks" will do, and so will "I have to go."

Having one friend stand with you makes it easier for both of you to say no. Practicing what you will say ahead of time helps you feel ready. Kids who feel good about themselves can usually make a decision and stick with it, even when friends say otherwise.

Sometimes a friend's push feels hard to handle. A grown-up you trust can help. A parent or other adult can step in when peer pressure gets too hard for a kid to handle. Feeling pushed is a normal part of growing up, and a grown-up you trust can help.

Words to know

• peers: people your age
• influence: change a choice
• belong: be part of
• uncomfortable: feeling not right
• practicing: trying ahead

The short version

Peer pressure is the feeling of being pushed by friends or classmates to think, look or act a certain way. Peers are people about your age. Friends can influence you and you can influence them, for good things as well as hard ones. A grown-up you trust can help when a push feels hard to handle.

Quick facts

• Peer pressure is feeling pushed by friends or classmates to think, look or act a certain way.
• Your peers are people about your age, such as friends, classmates and teammates.
• One reason kids go along with friends is that they want to fit in.
• A short, simple line like "No thanks" or "I have to go" is enough to say no.
• A parent or other adult can step in when peer pressure gets too hard for a kid to handle.